7 Steps to Positive Self-talk

 

Todd Astle

Written by Todd Astle, mental skills coach and
former international cricket player.

 

Most of us are in constant mental chatter with ourselves. We have that voice in our heads all day long, and unfortunately, this self-talk is frequently negative. Often it is tainted with guilt about the past or worry about the future. This negativity can hinder and even destroy our best efforts in striving for our goals and dreams.

Our actions are inspired by our thoughts. If we can change the way we think, we can begin to change the actions 7 Steps to Positive Self-talkwe take. 

It is human nature to seek personal growth; whether physically, emotionally, financially or spiritually. Practicing positive self-talk can help us set in motion actions that will bring us greater rewards.

The following are seven steps to enhancing productive, positive self-talk. By following these steps you will begin to rid your inner dialogue of negativity and instead have empowering thoughts.

 

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1. Awareness of and eliminating internal negative chatter

The first step is that of awareness. It will be hard to make a change to positive thinking without being acutely aware of the thoughts that run through your mind. Start to take note and write down the reoccurring negative chatter and statements. Ask yourself what evidence is there that this true? What is the consequence of continually thinking these thoughts? What is in my control? 

2. Positive Affirmations

Affirmations are positive statements of a desired outcome or goal. They are usually short, believable and focused. Using action words and statements that help build your confidence is just as important as building up a great technique or fitness base. Using language like “I am” and “I have” is more helpful than using words like “I’m going to” or “I will be”, e.g. “I am a great player”, not “I want to be a great player”. Have a go now with your own sport and dreams in mind. 

3. Positive Scripts

One thing that you may observe is how easy it is for your mind to build negative thought upon negative thought. The chatter not only doesn’t stop, but it spins a story that traps and limits you. From now on, regularly do this exercise instead. Project an uplifting story that runs like a movie script. Some visualisation will be helpful. See yourself being successful and in charge of your performance. You build on a story with a positive outline rather than negative.

4. Replace Negative Influences with Positive Ones

It is important that you identify external negative factors in your life which may be holding your thoughts hostage. For instance, your mental state can become toxic by being around friends and individuals who are constantly negative. If you are not aware enough, you will start to adopt their thoughts as your own. Instead surround yourself with thoughts and actions from people who will empower you. Study role models and champions who have gone before you and what they think, say and do.

5. Present Moment Messages

You may find yourself daunted by the many things you need to do in order to reach your goals. It can seem overwhelming to become the success that you secretly desire. Your mind gets caught up in an endless stream of uncertainty and worry. What may be helpful is to concentrate on steps you can take in the here and now. In the present. If you find yourself becoming stuck, stop and say, “What’s important now?” focus your thoughts and inner talk on ‘now’. Complete that task and then move onto the next. Remember ‘the journey of a thousand miles, begins with a single step’.

6. Confront Fears

Fear and doubt are often what holds us back from success. Ask yourself what you are afraid of. What could be the worst that can happen?

Take a step-by-step approach in breaking down your fears and see if there is any way round to looking at things more positively. When you confront your fears, you will often realise that the worst case scenario is not as bad as you think. Instead of all the ‘what ifs…’ replace them with ‘so what if…’ and a positive response. e.g., “So what if I don’t score a goal today, I will still give it my best effort and learn from each performance.”

Adopting a mindset of learning and continual improvement will mean fears and mistakes are simply building blocks to improvement and necessary steps on the path to your greatness.

7. Focus on Enjoyable Moments

7-steps-image2It is much easier to have a positive attitude if you focus on the enjoyable moments in your sport and life rather than the difficult ones. Whilst there will inevitably be challenges and set backs, you need to remember that life consists of ups and downs and the good times are forged through the bad. Come back to ‘why’ you play your sport, what does it mean to you? Another option is to recall past performances where you were at your best, in your ideal performance state, and how you can go about recreating this again. 

By following the above tips to positive self-talk, you will experience an improvement in the quality of your life. The rewards are plentiful with greater happiness, motivation, and focus. Best of all, you feel empowered. With this change in energy, you are more likely to reach your highest potential and achieve successful outcomes.

The biggest barrier to achieving our personal goals is more often than not ourselves. We need to retrain our thought patterns and self-talk to see the joys, opportunities, and possibilities in life, rather than the limitations.

Here’s to your greatness.

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The Wellbeing Works, 2023